We won a place in the Interior Design competition – Sharada, Parul and I.
We had 3 weeks to prepare and present our design. Like any other college students we postponed it until the deadline was on top of us. We had 2 days to come up with the design and presentation. Sharada and Parul lived in a dorm with many other architecture students. So we decided it would be best if I stayed over with them for a couple of days. If we needed something for a presentation we had a good chance of finding the materials from other students. We started late in the afternoon, right after our last class of the day. We worked through the night discussing ideas and coming up with a design we all agreed on. The next day, we went to our classes and returned to work on our project again. Now we had to finish the presentation. We stayed up all night for this. By mid morning, just an hour before the deadline we turned in our design.
After 2 days and 2 nights I returned home. As was usual I sat down with my family for tea. I told them about our design entry. After tea, I headed off to the bedroom to look for something. I sat on my bed trying to remember what I had come in for and fell asleep.
When I woke up, my bed was surrounded by 6 firemen.
After tea, my Mom had come in to tell me that all of them were headed off somewhere and since I was staying home, they weren’t going to take the house keys with them. Our front door was a self locking door. After a couple of hours they returned home and rang the doorbell. And rang and rang and rang. They rang it so much, that it actually broke down. Now they were really worried about me and wondered if something had happened. The neighbors had come out to see what was going. Someone suggested climbing over the balcony and entering through a window. This wasn’t really much of an option, as our apartment was on the 13th floor.
After some more waiting around and talking with our neighbors, my parents called the emergency number. Soon, a fire engine came, lights flashing, horn blowing and swung into our little compound. Now the whole building was curious as to what was going on. People spilled out of the building, a few were in the landing on our floor.
The firemen charged up, asked everyone to stand back and kicked open the door. By now it was late in the evening, so it was dark in the apartment. Torches on, they barged into the apartment and finding no funny business they let my family in. My Dad came and touched me. I up and found 6 firemen around my bed. Boy, were they cute.
You see, right after I went into the bedroom, I fell asleep. I don’t even remember lying down to rest or sleep. But after 2 nights of no sleep and intense work, I was so wiped out that I didn’t hear a thing until my Dad came in to wake me up.
Later my youngest sister told me how exciting it all was - the fire engine coming blaring through, the men kicking the door in, the whole shebang. She was the only one who thoroughly enjoyed the whole drama.
Showing posts with label sleeping. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sleeping. Show all posts
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Baby Care - 3
Bathing
Regarding bathing, the baby's doctor will probably tell you no water baths for the baby until the umbilical cord drops off (about a couple of weeks) - just 'dry cleaning' until then. One thing to take note is to make sure to clean the neck and behind the ears everyday. D1 never got chubby so I never had trouble with his neck. But D2 was quite chubby and even when I think I have cleaned his neck properly, I still find stuff in there. You really have to make them turn their head this way and that (they don’t like it one bit), but the stuff that settle in their necks makes their skin red.
Lotion
My pediatrician is a very strong advocate about this and I agree, no lotions of any sort, no matter how natural the claim on the bottle. I just use almond oil (any organic oil will do - coconut and in a crunch even olive oil). I buy almond oil from an Asian grocery store, much cheaper than getting it from a wholefoods kind of store. J&J Mineral oil is a big fat No No. The molecules are too fine and tend to plug the pores, as compared to the organic oils which are literally fatter and stay on the surface where they need to be to provide a protective layer.
A new baby has very dry and thin skin. So I would put a little oil on it, but not on the creases (which look so red and raw). This goes away though and in a week or so the skin starts looking better (may still be dry though).
Soap
My pediatrician repeated this to me almost every time I took the baby in. The best soap is Ivory soap. Plain old ivory soap. Not even J&J baby soap. Ivory soap is supposed to be the most gentle soap in the market. I used it for both D1 and D2 and it certainly didn’t dry out their skin.
Ear Infections
Here I will unfortunately be of very little help. I was lucky enough that D1 and D2 didn’t get their first ear infection until Kindergarten. Which is apparently quite common.
Colds
When they do get colds, you know they can’t have any medications so the best you can do is use the little bulb to clear their nasal passages. Especially before nursing or feeding, so they can drink some milk. For sleep, when D1 was in the crib, I would hang his mattress so it was on a higher rung on one side and a lower one of the other side (just one rung apart though). Then make sure to put him to bed at the bottom of the crib, so his feet are close to the end. He is going to slide down anyway, but this way I can be sure he won’t get buried under a blanket or something. In the cradle I put a big book under one end to make a slight angle. It helps them breath easier.
Diaper Bags
I got a big bag from Lands End. It was nice, but I usually don’t need to use such a big bag. But that is because I really didn’t take the baby out for long periods of time. I usually did really short excursions between meals. So most feedings were at home for example, I rarely fed him outside the home. But depending on how you plan to spend your days you may want to think of the size of the bag. They are useful (although I don’t carry mine all the time). But one thing I would recommend if you think you will be using yours a lot is getting one that is like a backpack. It is quite a pain to have a bag hang from one shoulder and balance the baby on the other side, especially when you have to carry the baby in the carseat. It seems the bag is constantly slipping off. Big pain.
Sleeping
For sleeping I referred to a book called Sleeping Through the Night by Jodi Mindell. I read the book and then took stuff from Your Self-Confident Baby by Magda Gerber and Allison Johnson and developed my own plan for self-soothing and started from there. Go with what feels right for you. But remember don’t chose an option just because you are chicken about making tough decisions for your kid. Some tough love goes a long way in keeping both of you sane.
When I was expecting D1 I read and read up stuff. I knew nothing about babies. The stuff I am writing are things that worked for me and helped me out.
Regarding bathing, the baby's doctor will probably tell you no water baths for the baby until the umbilical cord drops off (about a couple of weeks) - just 'dry cleaning' until then. One thing to take note is to make sure to clean the neck and behind the ears everyday. D1 never got chubby so I never had trouble with his neck. But D2 was quite chubby and even when I think I have cleaned his neck properly, I still find stuff in there. You really have to make them turn their head this way and that (they don’t like it one bit), but the stuff that settle in their necks makes their skin red.
Lotion
My pediatrician is a very strong advocate about this and I agree, no lotions of any sort, no matter how natural the claim on the bottle. I just use almond oil (any organic oil will do - coconut and in a crunch even olive oil). I buy almond oil from an Asian grocery store, much cheaper than getting it from a wholefoods kind of store. J&J Mineral oil is a big fat No No. The molecules are too fine and tend to plug the pores, as compared to the organic oils which are literally fatter and stay on the surface where they need to be to provide a protective layer.
A new baby has very dry and thin skin. So I would put a little oil on it, but not on the creases (which look so red and raw). This goes away though and in a week or so the skin starts looking better (may still be dry though).
Soap
My pediatrician repeated this to me almost every time I took the baby in. The best soap is Ivory soap. Plain old ivory soap. Not even J&J baby soap. Ivory soap is supposed to be the most gentle soap in the market. I used it for both D1 and D2 and it certainly didn’t dry out their skin.
Ear Infections
Here I will unfortunately be of very little help. I was lucky enough that D1 and D2 didn’t get their first ear infection until Kindergarten. Which is apparently quite common.
Colds
When they do get colds, you know they can’t have any medications so the best you can do is use the little bulb to clear their nasal passages. Especially before nursing or feeding, so they can drink some milk. For sleep, when D1 was in the crib, I would hang his mattress so it was on a higher rung on one side and a lower one of the other side (just one rung apart though). Then make sure to put him to bed at the bottom of the crib, so his feet are close to the end. He is going to slide down anyway, but this way I can be sure he won’t get buried under a blanket or something. In the cradle I put a big book under one end to make a slight angle. It helps them breath easier.
Diaper Bags
I got a big bag from Lands End. It was nice, but I usually don’t need to use such a big bag. But that is because I really didn’t take the baby out for long periods of time. I usually did really short excursions between meals. So most feedings were at home for example, I rarely fed him outside the home. But depending on how you plan to spend your days you may want to think of the size of the bag. They are useful (although I don’t carry mine all the time). But one thing I would recommend if you think you will be using yours a lot is getting one that is like a backpack. It is quite a pain to have a bag hang from one shoulder and balance the baby on the other side, especially when you have to carry the baby in the carseat. It seems the bag is constantly slipping off. Big pain.
Sleeping
For sleeping I referred to a book called Sleeping Through the Night by Jodi Mindell. I read the book and then took stuff from Your Self-Confident Baby by Magda Gerber and Allison Johnson and developed my own plan for self-soothing and started from there. Go with what feels right for you. But remember don’t chose an option just because you are chicken about making tough decisions for your kid. Some tough love goes a long way in keeping both of you sane.
When I was expecting D1 I read and read up stuff. I knew nothing about babies. The stuff I am writing are things that worked for me and helped me out.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Baby Care - 2
Bottle Feeding
I decided to breastfeed. But it was very difficult. I can now admit to myself that I was not one of those women who produce copious amounts of milk. And if I had a do-over, I would still nurse, but supplement with formula, even if it meant that I would have become dry faster.
I respect people's decision to bottle feed (pretty much everyone else in my family did), but there is something special about nursing too, the thought that you are producing the essential food for your baby and providing all kinds of immunity for them. But aside from that, it just as wonderful to bottle feed them when they cuddle up with you.
When my kids were a few months, they both had to do some bottle feeding when I returned to work and they went to day cares. For bottles we decided to go with the bottles where you put in a liner. I knew before D1 would be a year old we would be traveling to India. While I would have to sterilize the nipples myself, at least eliminating the bottles for sterilizing was a huge break.
Regarding nipple selection, there are tons of them out there, but I chose the bottle with the liner and they only have a couple of nipples to choose from, I offered it to my kid and that was that. I don't think kids are as fussy about nipples and stuff as the manufacturers would like us to believe. When the babies are hungry, the milk is the right temperature, and it flows through when they suck = Happy Baby
It ended up having another advantage I had never thought of, as they got a little older and were able to sit up. They liked to drink from their bottle sitting up, whether I was holding them or they were sitting up by themselves. Since the liner simply works on suction, they can keep sucking the nipple and the milk with keep flowing. One of by boys also like to keep sucking even when the milk was over. Just for the fun of it. BTW, also easier to get the air out of the bottle.
The reason I say this was an unexpected surprise was because when I switched them to cups, the never noticed that they had to sit up now as opposed to lying down to drink.
Another decision I made with D1 and later with D2 was to switch them from milk bottles to bottles with straws. For one thing they have a very similar look, although it still takes them a couple of tries to figure out how to suck through the straw. Again, they didn't have to learn yet another thing, tip the cup to drink. They simply held the bottle straight like they did with their milk bottle and drank.
My reasoning for a straw bottle was again our trip to India. I didn't want to carry a bunch of sippy cups and a package of straws is so much easier to handle. Not to mention any place we go I could get my kids to drink even in the absence of a sippy cup. Those days, people in India still did the simple way, kids didn't use sippy cups. Nowadays, they are pretty common.
Sleeping
D2 was so good about sleeping I forgot how consuming an issue it can be. D1 was really difficult in that regard. Babies sleep 16 hours the first few days, I don't know when those hours were when D1 was a baby. You may get lucky and get a sleeper.
But if you don't, just remember one thing, whatever method you choose to soothe the baby you are going to be stuck with it for a long time. So choose wisely. Walking the floor and rocking and singing seems very easy when they are only 8 lbs and fall asleep in 5 minutes. Soon they are 15 lbs and getting bigger and take longer to fall asleep and before you know it, you are pacing the floor for an hour and more, and several times in the night. So do think about this one issue seriously.
We decided that D1 and D2 had to learn to soothe themselves as soon as they were 6 weeks old. This can become a major issue if you get a sleep resister, like D1 was and still is at 10 years old. Especially because it cuts into your rest, and I believe you cannot be a good parent when you are sleep deprived and exhausted (some amount of exhaustion is to be expected, but not to the point where it begins to affect judgement, which is what was happening with D1).
Putting babies down to sleep has nothing to do with the debate on holding babies. I believe when they are awake and they want to be held, hold them. They like being held up and being able to see the world from a different view. But if they are happy and staring at the wall and not fussing, let them be. Even if you cannot understand what is so fascinating about the wall, so what, let your baby have her enjoyment.
Another thing to remember is baby's sleeping patterns are not uniform. That is just because they started sleeping through the night at 6 weeks, doesn't mean that at 3 months he will not start fussing again at night. Usually, babies have sleep disruptions during growth spurts - brain growth wise. This is especially stark when they are about 9 months old. That is the first time, they begin to recognize, familiar faces and strangers. And for the first time they become uncomfortable with strangers. They usually start waking up at night again for a few weeks.
More on baby sleeping myths. They are not quiet, in fact, they are quite noisy, even when sound asleep. In that first year, when they go from sleeping 16 hour days to 4 naps a day and down to 2 naps a day. That again doesn't happen on some predetermined schedule written in a book. I believe if you find some balance between learning your kids tired cues and sticking to some kind of pattern regarding sleep times and rituals, they will do reasonably well. Will this work every sleep time? No! For one thing, they may be getting ready to give up a naptime. They can't do this overnight. So some days they will nap 3 times, some days 2 times, some days 3 times, but one really short one. It takes a while. Sometimes they won't nap, but you know they need their rest, so you can say, even if you don't want to nap, this is rest time and you can lie down quietly and/or look at a book. Many times, just quieting down puts them to sleep, if not, they have still rested enough so the rest of they is not painful for all.
Another debate is co-sleeping. People all over the world do it, it is natural. However, that doesn't mean it is always the best choice. I started co-sleeping with D1, but like I mentioned earlier, I don't know when his 16 hours of sleep began. So within a few short days, I was so sleep deprived I was walking around like a zombie. One night he fussed in bed and I thought I nursed them. I heard him fussing again and thought, didn't I just feed him. I hadn't fed him, what I had done was fling the comforter away from me and it was over him. That's when I decided sitting up at night and feeding him was better than having him with me. We both actually did better after I moved him to his own crib, although he was still in our room.
The hardest part of parenting at this time is not having any control on your own time. It is so totally tied to your baby's schedule. And if that isn't bad enough, you get a million comparisons from people about how this baby is doing this and that baby is doing that. Sometimes we get so caught up with that and start feeling guilty that you are not being a good enough parent. You should be doing more. But the simple truth is, you are doing just fine with your kid if you enjoy being with him.
Unfortunately, because we don't know what we are doing most of the time we start feeling guilty. Remember this, parenting is about feeling worried and guilty all the time. If you can overcome this emotion, you are home free, the rest is easy.
I decided to breastfeed. But it was very difficult. I can now admit to myself that I was not one of those women who produce copious amounts of milk. And if I had a do-over, I would still nurse, but supplement with formula, even if it meant that I would have become dry faster.
I respect people's decision to bottle feed (pretty much everyone else in my family did), but there is something special about nursing too, the thought that you are producing the essential food for your baby and providing all kinds of immunity for them. But aside from that, it just as wonderful to bottle feed them when they cuddle up with you.
When my kids were a few months, they both had to do some bottle feeding when I returned to work and they went to day cares. For bottles we decided to go with the bottles where you put in a liner. I knew before D1 would be a year old we would be traveling to India. While I would have to sterilize the nipples myself, at least eliminating the bottles for sterilizing was a huge break.
Regarding nipple selection, there are tons of them out there, but I chose the bottle with the liner and they only have a couple of nipples to choose from, I offered it to my kid and that was that. I don't think kids are as fussy about nipples and stuff as the manufacturers would like us to believe. When the babies are hungry, the milk is the right temperature, and it flows through when they suck = Happy Baby
It ended up having another advantage I had never thought of, as they got a little older and were able to sit up. They liked to drink from their bottle sitting up, whether I was holding them or they were sitting up by themselves. Since the liner simply works on suction, they can keep sucking the nipple and the milk with keep flowing. One of by boys also like to keep sucking even when the milk was over. Just for the fun of it. BTW, also easier to get the air out of the bottle.
The reason I say this was an unexpected surprise was because when I switched them to cups, the never noticed that they had to sit up now as opposed to lying down to drink.
Another decision I made with D1 and later with D2 was to switch them from milk bottles to bottles with straws. For one thing they have a very similar look, although it still takes them a couple of tries to figure out how to suck through the straw. Again, they didn't have to learn yet another thing, tip the cup to drink. They simply held the bottle straight like they did with their milk bottle and drank.
My reasoning for a straw bottle was again our trip to India. I didn't want to carry a bunch of sippy cups and a package of straws is so much easier to handle. Not to mention any place we go I could get my kids to drink even in the absence of a sippy cup. Those days, people in India still did the simple way, kids didn't use sippy cups. Nowadays, they are pretty common.
Sleeping
D2 was so good about sleeping I forgot how consuming an issue it can be. D1 was really difficult in that regard. Babies sleep 16 hours the first few days, I don't know when those hours were when D1 was a baby. You may get lucky and get a sleeper.
But if you don't, just remember one thing, whatever method you choose to soothe the baby you are going to be stuck with it for a long time. So choose wisely. Walking the floor and rocking and singing seems very easy when they are only 8 lbs and fall asleep in 5 minutes. Soon they are 15 lbs and getting bigger and take longer to fall asleep and before you know it, you are pacing the floor for an hour and more, and several times in the night. So do think about this one issue seriously.
We decided that D1 and D2 had to learn to soothe themselves as soon as they were 6 weeks old. This can become a major issue if you get a sleep resister, like D1 was and still is at 10 years old. Especially because it cuts into your rest, and I believe you cannot be a good parent when you are sleep deprived and exhausted (some amount of exhaustion is to be expected, but not to the point where it begins to affect judgement, which is what was happening with D1).
Putting babies down to sleep has nothing to do with the debate on holding babies. I believe when they are awake and they want to be held, hold them. They like being held up and being able to see the world from a different view. But if they are happy and staring at the wall and not fussing, let them be. Even if you cannot understand what is so fascinating about the wall, so what, let your baby have her enjoyment.
Another thing to remember is baby's sleeping patterns are not uniform. That is just because they started sleeping through the night at 6 weeks, doesn't mean that at 3 months he will not start fussing again at night. Usually, babies have sleep disruptions during growth spurts - brain growth wise. This is especially stark when they are about 9 months old. That is the first time, they begin to recognize, familiar faces and strangers. And for the first time they become uncomfortable with strangers. They usually start waking up at night again for a few weeks.
More on baby sleeping myths. They are not quiet, in fact, they are quite noisy, even when sound asleep. In that first year, when they go from sleeping 16 hour days to 4 naps a day and down to 2 naps a day. That again doesn't happen on some predetermined schedule written in a book. I believe if you find some balance between learning your kids tired cues and sticking to some kind of pattern regarding sleep times and rituals, they will do reasonably well. Will this work every sleep time? No! For one thing, they may be getting ready to give up a naptime. They can't do this overnight. So some days they will nap 3 times, some days 2 times, some days 3 times, but one really short one. It takes a while. Sometimes they won't nap, but you know they need their rest, so you can say, even if you don't want to nap, this is rest time and you can lie down quietly and/or look at a book. Many times, just quieting down puts them to sleep, if not, they have still rested enough so the rest of they is not painful for all.
Another debate is co-sleeping. People all over the world do it, it is natural. However, that doesn't mean it is always the best choice. I started co-sleeping with D1, but like I mentioned earlier, I don't know when his 16 hours of sleep began. So within a few short days, I was so sleep deprived I was walking around like a zombie. One night he fussed in bed and I thought I nursed them. I heard him fussing again and thought, didn't I just feed him. I hadn't fed him, what I had done was fling the comforter away from me and it was over him. That's when I decided sitting up at night and feeding him was better than having him with me. We both actually did better after I moved him to his own crib, although he was still in our room.
The hardest part of parenting at this time is not having any control on your own time. It is so totally tied to your baby's schedule. And if that isn't bad enough, you get a million comparisons from people about how this baby is doing this and that baby is doing that. Sometimes we get so caught up with that and start feeling guilty that you are not being a good enough parent. You should be doing more. But the simple truth is, you are doing just fine with your kid if you enjoy being with him.
Unfortunately, because we don't know what we are doing most of the time we start feeling guilty. Remember this, parenting is about feeling worried and guilty all the time. If you can overcome this emotion, you are home free, the rest is easy.
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